Friday, June 10, 2016

H&P #8...Take Two

I recently spoke at a local women's conference.  My topic was, "How to Find Silver Linings in Even the Darkest Skies."  This was right up my alley, as this very idea has become one of my mottos in life.  During my first cancer battle, I made a goal to become more grateful and to notice and give gratitude for even the smallest blessings.  I also began learning to follow the phrase, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade."  I used to think that finding the silver linings in life was synonymous with making lemonade out of lemons, but I now see at least two major differences.   

First, when certain trials hit, it can seem nearly impossible to turn the sour into sweet.  As my sister-in-law so clearly explained once, "when a truckload of lemons is dumped on you unexpectedly, it's hard enough to just dig your way out and find air to breathe.  How can you possibly start making lemonade, if you are so overwhelmed by being trapped in a pile of lemons that you can't even get to the kitchen?"  I loved this new take on the lemons to lemonade concept.  She's right.  Certain trials are so overwhelming that just surviving in the midst of them is the most a person can do.  When you are doing your best to not become completely consumed by the lemons of life, but you still have no "lemonade" to show for your efforts, is it possible that you might still be making the best of a bad situation?  Yes!  It is quite possible, indeed!  

Often, optimism during the most difficult times is not as simple as just taking the bad and making something good out of it.  Making lemonade out of the lemons of life is not a simple one-step process.  It takes time.  Finding silver linings---staying humble and full of gratitude, even during trials---is something that can be done in the meantime.  It is possible to take life's lemons and be grateful that they aren't heavier, or be happy that the lemons' yellow hue is reminisicent of the brightness of the sun, that you know how you got your lemons, that you have a bag to help carry the lemons, or that someone has come by to help.  Even if you can't turn the sour points of life into lemonade right away,  you can learn how to recognize blessings and slowly work your way to the kitchen, or at least dig out, breathe, and start carrying the lemons you've been given.

Another difference, you're not always going to be able to turn your lemons into lemonade.  Sometimes, you will always be stuck with lemons.  You might have sugar, a juicer, a pitcher, and other necessities required to change this sour fruit into a refreshingly sweet beverage, but there are certain lemons that will always stay lemons.  How can a person make sweetness out of sour if the sour never goes away?  It is possible to find the sweetness in life even if your lemons never change to lemonade?  Yes!  

Lemons themselves have other uses than just lemonade.  Use lemons with water, or to accompany and flavor seafood.  The zest can give a brightness to many dishes.  Lemons can aid in cleaning.  These are only a few ways to use a lemon that don't involve lemonade.  When you are unable to change your trials, there are still ways to find joy in life.  You might have to learn how to keep on living, keep on finding the things for which you can be grateful, even when the bitterness of life doesn't change to sweet.  

Both "lemons to lemonade" and "silver linings" teach optimism amidst trials.  The thing we forget to notice is that we might never taste the lemonade in this life, and we might never truly see a sky without dark clouds.  The truest gratitude and most positive outlook is to learn to understand that even when there seems to be no hope, there is always hope.  Even when trials seem unbearable, there is a way made that you may bear them.  Even if all we can see is darkness, there is always light.  Sometimes, faith in that Light is the only thing that can help us weather the storms.  

I will never be able to rid my life of cancer.  Unfortunately, cancer is a lemon that I won't ever be able to make completely sweet.  However, I'm able to use this platform to inspire others, to share my experiences, and to be a voice for believing in miracles.  Even though I can't turn all of these lemons into lemonade, I can bring sweetness into my life and the lives of others.

Silver linings are those moments of tender mercy when we are able to see the light through the storm, when we are given glimpses of the great love God has for each of us.  Some of life's storms are never over.   Some of life's lemons cannot turn to lemonade.  However, if we keep pressing on, we know that it is possible to survive, even through the storms and even though some lemons will always just been lemons.  It is possible to have faith that even when we can't calm the storm or sweeten the sour, there is One who can and does in small and simple ways.  Instead of trying to change the trials that are guaranteed to accompany mortality, is is our job to find the blessings that accompany the challenges.  Often, knowing that we are loved, that we are constantly blessed, and that there is a chance that things could change is all it takes to keep going one more day.             



Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Herceptin & Perjeta #8......Take One

I was supposed to have a treatment today. I got up and got my boys ready and packed to go to a friend's house. I drove to the Cancer Center and waited for my turn. I chose my chair and made myself comfortable. Then, I was told that there was a mistake and someone forgot to order my Perjeta. 
So....now we get to turn around and try this all again on Friday. They told me I could bring the boys, but thankfully, my friend offered to watch them again.  
Best laid plans.