I'm changing things up and having treatment on a Thursday. (My regular schedule for next week would've put me needing treatment while on vacation. I had a visit with Dr. Fleener first thing. She again smiled while discussing the results of my latest MRI--it still looks great! We talked about my vision issues, which have-thankfully-not been too much of a problem since our last appointment.
"Maybe I'm just getting old and need some reading glasses!" I said.
"You're not old!" was her response.
I'll see her again in a few weeks to revisit the pill, as long as my body starts to cooperate!
I met a few new patients in the chemo chair today. The husband of a woman who was getting her first treatment told me, "Just getting to talk to you and hear your story is such a comfort to us. Thank you for that."
The COMFORT stood out to me, for in my scripture reading a few weeks ago, I came across a verse that stood out to me like it never before had:
For the Lord God shall COMFORT Zion,
he will COMFORT all her waste places;
and he will make her wilderness like Eden,
and her desert like the garden of the Lord.
JOY and GLADNESS shall be found therein,
thanksgiving and the voice of MELODY.
2 Nephi 8:3
Obviously, the "Melody" caught my attention, as if He was speaking straight to me. I was also touched by the testimony that God comforts us in our "waste places." Whether that be in sickness, hardship, trials, or temptations. He doesn't take all the bad out of our lives, but comforts us while we are in our wilderness. He can provide enough comfort that walking through our deserts can seem like a plentiful garden. God offers protection or help to weather the storm, by strengthening our souls and through people He brings into our lives or even through prayers and kindness of strangers.
Beyond just the comfort to make it through hard times, we can actually have joy and gladness if we strive to find it. There is always a reason for thanksgiving, even if it might seem small to others. Honestly, I'm not one of those people who is truly GLAD for cancer. I wish it didn't have to define my life. There might be lessons I've learned through the experience that could have been difficult to learn other ways, but even that doesn't make me happy that I have cancer. I do have gratitude for remission and in the little things. I can give thanks to God for each day I have to spend with my family. And, I have felt joy and gladness over more days than I can count. It's not as if I dance around, smiling and singing, without a care in the world, all day, every day. God's comfort has allowed me to see sunshine in the storm and seek out and find the many blessings I have. That has helped to notice joy and gladness through the pain.
Although it looks as if I'll never "beat" cancer in this life, there is still hope. I hope I'll be healthy enough to raise my boys for many years. I hope I can be a support to others. I hope for the strength to accomplish daily tasks. I hope that I can endure whatever challenges come my way. Hope opens the way for joy, and everyone deserves to feel it.
(You heard it from the voice of Melodee.)
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