I've had a perspective shift this week, thanks to some thought-provoking statements that came out of a visit with a friend and a conversation with my dad.
1} "If you can fix it with money, don't worry too much about it."
My friend shared with me a thought from a family she knew who lost a child to cancer. After this tragedy, they began to say {and I'm paraphrasing} that any trial that could be solved with money was temporal and something to not worry so much about. Even though I'm not sure my experience with cancer is the same as something more trivial, like cracking a phone, that can be quickly solved, I needed this shift in perspective. My outlook is good. Yes, when you boil it down, my problem can be solved with money. And time. There's a little pain, discomfort, emotional stress, loss of identity, etc., but I live in a time when I can pay for medicine and surgery that can heal me. {On a side note, sometimes it takes LOTS of money. I got the initial paperwork from my insurance about the claim for my reconstruction....JUST the reconstruction. Think about your guess of the cost of that procedure, JUST the surgeon's portion. And then double it. At least. Try not to have a panic attack when you see that he is "out of network," which means they are NOW saying they will only pay 60%, instead of the negotiated 80%, and the amount "you may owe" your doctor could buy a new Mercedes. My doctor's office assured me that my panic attack was premature, as they are still in negotiations. I'll most likely only be responsible for my deductible in the end.} Even though this cancer stuff is a long process and not exactly easy, it can be solved. I'll just tell myself over and over that money is temporal. Any problem that can be solved with money is something to not worry too much about, and my cancer will be gone long before the bills are paid.
2} The "Good Old Days" were once "These Trying Times."
I was complaining to my dad about how hard things are and how it's been such a tough year. It's been 9 months since my diagnosis, and I still have many more months to go. It feels like a marathon, and it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But, the worst of my cancer struggle is probably behind me, and now comes the enduring to the end part. Before I know it, May 2014 will be here, and they'll be pulling my port out. I can then get on to the next challenge in life. That's when Dad told me that "The 'good old days' were once called 'these trying times.'" When I'm busy dealing with future challenges, I might even look back and see all the good from this point in my life, all the simple things about young children and even call them "the good old days," despite living through hell and back with cancer at the same time. This got me thinking. Why not focus on the good from any 'Old Day' of the week? There are good things we can do, even while in the midst of trying times. We tend to remember with fondness all the blessings and beautiful parts of life, letting the terrible things fade away. If everyday is a good day, are there really "Good Old Days" or just happy memories pulled from past trials?
I liked this quote:
In every age 'the good old days' were a myth. No one ever thought they were good at the time. For every age has consisted of crises that seemed intolerable to the people who lived through them."
Brooks Atkinson
I could focus on how hard everything is, complain about my lot in life, stay down in the dumps, and feel sorry for myself. Or, I could do something everyday to see the good in THAT day. There will always be trying times along with miracles. It's what we remember that makes the difference.
No comments:
Post a Comment