Wednesday, December 23, 2020

Cadcyla #2

 ~HALLELUJAH~


After this second infusion of what seems to be exactly what I needed to end out the year, "God be praised!" 




 I have reason to rejoice, for sure.  After a beyond-rough year for this world, there are not enough words to describe the hardships, suffering, agony, loneliness, confused disturbances, and loss, storms, and pain of all kinds.  However, this year is coming to an end.  

Perhaps a new number with which to name and organize time will allow us to better receive the gift of joy.  Perhaps the Brouhahas and Bally-Hoos will pull back, making way for more peace.  Perhaps many of the lack of peace on earth will remain the same, but each person can choose to step up and beyond.  In all the ways of experiencing suffering and strife, therein lies the choice to embrace hope.  

Gifts of joy, peace, and hope to rise above the trials of every year are available to all, but must be received.  Their powers to change hearts become powerless if not chosen and cherished.  

The challenge I have had from experiences as I've survived nearly a decade of BTHO cancer have changed me.  My individual attempts to convert from a feeling that sarcasm and simply pushing aside the downheartedness, were the best coping mechanisms for trials, had to change.  I had survived by adopting the mental and emotional survival skill of expecting the worst and hoping for the best.  This thinking was a small step in the right direction.  It helped me to see that focusing my energies toward hoping for better made me stronger and more grateful for the tiniest rays of light.

Unfortunately, experiences sometimes don't level up toward the best for years and years.....or ever.  How can there be survival with no pink skies or rainbows to break up eons of storms?  I began to turn my heart when my own trials turned to more than I could bear.  My previous disrespectful judgments of those being defeated by challenges which felt less difficult than my own, changed to the understanding that everyone has their own cankers and cancers.  There is corruption in every country.  We all are challenged, at times, on how to truly believe the light will ever shine again. 

After years and years of receiving healing gifts, I know that light shines---------always.  From the new star in the sky so long ago, to the similar symbol during the winter solstice of this corrupted and contaminated calendar turn.  To all those still suffering in what feels like constant darkness, believe that hard times can change.  Each heart and mind can allow the heavenly gifts of love and hope and peace to seep in and brighten darkness.  The same spirit of joy and love and peace can flood the globe beyond one holiday.  It starts in celebration of the gift of baby born under the light of the star, who continues as  He shares His gifts to all mankind for every night to come. It continues for the year ahead, which will be better as we let the gift of that light so shine.    


"...King of kings!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

And Lord of lords!                                                                                                                    Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah! 

King of kings and Lord of lords!

 

...And He shall reign
And He shall reign
And He shall reign forever and ever 

King of kings (Forever and ever)
And He shall reign (Hallelujah! Hallelujah!)
And He shall reign forever and ever
King of kings! and Lord of lords!
King of kings! and Lord of lords!
And He shall reign forever and ever
Forever and ever
Forever and ever
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!"

                                                ---Handel/Eshkeri, 1741


This masterpiece has especially resonated with my soul, as we have entered the Christmas season of 2020.  I hope the meaning can spread all the gifts of Christmas to your heart this year and bring hope for years to come!


My Christmas week at the Cancer Clinic was lovely.  I was able to bring gifts to cheer and share smiles to may masked faces.  Dr. Cole was excited to have my same pj's at home, and gave me the last check-over of the year.  I was clear to proceed for the day.  The Fellow came to say goodbye, as his six months with Dr. Cole is ending.  "This will be the last time I see you."  I handed him a shiny star ornament and thanked him for being a star in my journey.




 I heard him exclaim, and he strolled out the door, "I've never received a gift from a patient before!"  He turned back to smile and give thanks for the gift. I saw that the light was there to uplift.The nurses were shocked and gave a jolly, ol' cry.  "Oh, girl! Merry Christmas! You always surprise!"  In my Holly pajamas, and red, sparkly hat, I pulled more gifts from my bag, just like that.  Again came the joy and the glints in their eyes.....the Christmas Spirit present gave love to all sides.  

Soon I was out until the next year, with hopes someday they'll all cheer: "Cancer's ALL CLEAR!" 




May the Light of the World shine to homes and hearts always.  Merry Christmas, and BTHO all your trials and hard times.  Much love to all, and Joy for the New Year.

 






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