Here we are, already in March. I'm hoping for a lot of luck to head my way. Here's to the Gingers of the Irish + the good fortune of the green and gold.
First bit of luck: lunch of green Chile enchiladas. Although it was not Irish, this dish brought in a New Mexican hint of great hopefulness.
After having been kicked out of MyChart, my health app, after working on getting set up for hours at the last chemo appointment, my low points of frustration and sarcasm were fighting to take over and knock out the hope and joy. I couldn't get any messages in or out to my providers, other than through phone calls. The schedules of those calls never seem to work out, especially when I'm working with health care locations in two different time zones. In addition, trying to transfer all the paperwork from my past appointments of gamma knife radiation in Dallas/finding times between my regularly scheduled chemo/making trips to Lubbock to meet with a neurosurgeon/another MRI/and then FINALLY making the actual radiation treatment appointment were all gumming up the machine.
Today is exactly ONE MONTH since diagnosis with these new brain tumors, and we've only made baby steps in the process. I have 2 out of the 3 major steps set up, but they won't happen until THE END of THIS month, after having to shuffle around schedules between the two locations. All this waiting, and the main treatment that will zap out the beast is still on the wait list. I'm getting a little anxious because I know my own history with aggressive growth in cancers' past. I can't help but think about the very beginning of the journey when I waited a month between mammogram and treatment and my oncologist at the time told me that she was concerned that the tumor in my breast doubled in size during that time. I really don't want this time to be like that. I just want to get it all to work and at an efficient timeframe
Why does this have to always seem so difficult?
Here is where I really have to have faith in prayer and happy thoughts that all the moving pieces will somehow make me whole....Again.....In time for my planned beach trip next month. Maybe with enough luck and love and grace in the waiting place, these pieces of the puzzle will all end up fitting exactly in the perfect place and time.
Here's to hope and faith and a little bit of luck, I'll continue to BTHOC.
Don't worry. As long as all the pieces will just come together and the baby steps will get a little bigger and faster, so I will be able to get to all the appointments at precisely the right times, and stay completely still so the gamma knife radiation will strike at the precise locations.......everything will be fine.*
*Bonus points to those who can connect that last statement with one of my all-time favorite movies.
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